How to "blow'em all up!" and have some fun in the process.
War is supposed to be serious business, right? Well, not according to German WWII technical writers who turned their thick and boring tank manuals for "Tiger" & "Panther" tanks into some sort of a "Popular Science"/"Playboy"/comic book combination.
These juicy manuals proved to be so popular, that they were even translated into Russian language and read throughout the Soviet Army tank corps. Let me show you a couple of genuine Nazi tank manuals, and see if you can learn something from them in a fun and accessible manner.
Tiger Tank Manual, 1943
The German "Tiger" Tank was introduced in August 1942, at the time being the most powerful tank in the world. The success of the Tiger was so profound, that no Allied tank dared to engage it in open combat. This psychological fear soon became to be known as "Tigerphobia". Drivers inside the tank, in the meantime could peruse the following instructions:
Diving the "Tiger" is a prestigious business, similar to driving a "Mercedes":
Driving on highways will get you as far as Berlin, but if you go off-road you'll only get as far as Brandenburg - and it's going to take a lot of fuel! -
Good communication is essential for "having a good-time", in peaceful times as well as during wartime:
You should take good care of your tank shells, just as you take good care of your girl:
Good aim is everything! -
You have to be a certain kind of artist in your heart, to drive a tank:
Aiming your shots right will bring Ivan to his knees faster:
When preparing to shoot, note how fast you're going:
Take good care of your tank! Thousands of German workers toiled endlessly to make sure that you get a top quality product, and after all, German engineering, as we all know, does not come cheap:
"Captured Panthers proved to be extremely popular vehicles among Soviet troops, who received them as rewards for extraordinary achievements in combat, and who sought to keep them in service as long as possible..."
"... contrary to regulations that captured Tigers and Panthers should not be repaired but abandoned and destroyed after mechanical failure. Even the humorous instruction manuals for German Panther crews, called Pantherfibels (a Panther Primer), were duly translated into Russian and provided to the crews lucky enough to get a captured Panther." (more info)
Nazi Tanks? I never knew Tanks could have a political view. Maybe you meant German tanks! Just like an American Soldier isn't a Republican soldier doesn't mean all Germans were Nazis, they can have a good sense of humor indeed.
"For every grenade that you fire: your father paid 100 Reichsmarks in taxes, your mother worked for a week in a factory, a train drove 10,000 kilometers!
I recommend a look at the Luftwaffe's 1944 gunnery manual for fighter pilots, the "Schiessfiebel" as approved by famous General Adolf Galland. It abounds in drawings of scantily clad or nude females, accompanied by rhymed instructions, e.g. to explain such concepts as "aspect angle".
I'm sure by 44 the Germans were running a little short on humor, but I could see them being a little cocky in 42 after easily taking over europe, and quickly advancing in Russia. The manual clearly shows how the Germans thought they were invincible.
I think it was during the Vietnam war that the US Army started publishing PM magazine. It was a cartoon-like magazine full of tips for keeping your weapons and equipment in good working order. At that time the cartoons showed Connie (a 40DD Blonde) and Bonnie (a 40DD black girl) showing how to perform the maintenance. They were often very scantily clad (think Daisy Dukes outfits) as well. Since then PM has cleaned up. Bonnie and Connie have nad breast reductions (34B?) and they have added other characters like a grizzled maintenance NCO, a dashing young aviator, etc. Sigh, those were the days!
Lovely pages! I'd really like to have scans of all the pages so I can make my own Fibel for further reading pleasure... Is that possible? Peter_dehaasattele2.nl
Yeah, Duel was seriously scary. Speaking of scary, I can just imagine some kid in the back of his mom's minivan when they pass that evil clown truck on the road.
Does anyone remember that retro movie with those cool futuristic trailer trucks that had missiles and guns and other bells and whistles attached to them? The protagonist would drive them around and blow his enemies to smithereens. I can't remember how it ends, but I think one of his trucks gets destroyed. Anyone know what movie I'm talking about? I saw it when I was younger, but never paid attention to the title. I get all nostalgic whenever I think about it.
It is a black "Skinny Pig", I have a white one. They were mutated in a lab to make them hairless. Quite a hazardess act, but yes,,, 100% Skinny Pig. Mines name is KEMO. lol
Wow - great find. I am definitely not used to seeing pictures from that era in color. I really would have thought they were from later on until I started seeing the cars and the clothes.
I believe the one picture is from Sandusky, Ohio. Look at the top left and you can see the roller coasters at Cedar Point. I may be incorrect but Sandusky has the N&W rail system and I don't think Cleveland did.
|
17 Comments:
Haha Nazis had a great sense of humor. I never would have imagined.
Nazi Tanks? I never knew Tanks could have a political view. Maybe you meant German tanks! Just like an American Soldier isn't a Republican soldier doesn't mean all Germans were Nazis, they can have a good sense of humor indeed.
Funny though :)
You know, if only textbook authors can learn from these fine examples on how to motivate readers to keep reading and understanding.
Kathy Sierra may get a kick out of this.
If you understand the descriptions it's even more funny xD
that's how militarism works. make them forget they kill people.
"For every grenade that you fire:
your father paid 100 Reichsmarks in taxes,
your mother worked for a week in a factory,
a train drove 10,000 kilometers!
Think about that before every shot!"
Thats a neat find, who says history is boring?
I recommend a look at the Luftwaffe's 1944 gunnery manual for fighter pilots, the "Schiessfiebel" as approved by famous General Adolf Galland. It abounds in drawings of scantily clad or nude females, accompanied by rhymed instructions, e.g. to explain such concepts as "aspect angle".
The Luftwaffe obviously wanted its pilot to score, one way or the other. See for yourself: http://www.rafiger.de/Homepage/Pages/Schiessfibel.html
That is unbelievable creepy.
I'm sure by 44 the Germans were running a little short on humor, but I could see them being a little cocky in 42 after easily taking over europe, and quickly advancing in Russia. The manual clearly shows how the Germans thought they were invincible.
Oh those Nazis...
Those Nazi's knew funny. Using sex to sell war, better than Detroit using sex to sell cars.
Ron Russell, Author of "Don Carina"
I thought the manuals were funny. Maybe manuals for electronics need to be funny.
What I did not like was the 20 requests to place cookies.
Latvija - what's wrong, you don't like cookies? :)
all cookies are harmless here, its just ad banners doing their normal thing.
Oh my God, those are like those nutty instruction manuals for the
American and British forces.
Same style, same jokes! I swear it must be the same cartoonists doing the work for everybody.
We ARE art whores, you know.
I have to share this with all my comics and cartoonists friends.
I think it was during the Vietnam war that the US Army started publishing PM magazine. It was a cartoon-like magazine full of tips for keeping your weapons and equipment in good working order. At that time the cartoons showed Connie (a 40DD Blonde) and Bonnie (a 40DD black girl) showing how to perform the maintenance. They were often very scantily clad (think Daisy Dukes outfits) as well. Since then PM has cleaned up. Bonnie and Connie have nad breast reductions (34B?) and they have added other characters like a grizzled maintenance NCO, a dashing young aviator, etc. Sigh, those were the days!
Lovely pages! I'd really like to have scans of all the pages so I can make my own Fibel for further reading pleasure... Is that possible? Peter_dehaasattele2.nl
Post a Comment
<< Home