"QUANTUM SHOT" #22 Some simple and genius revelations, made by students Teacher: "Who can tell me what 7 times 6 is?" Student: "It's 42!" Teacher: "Very good!  And who can tell me what 6 times 7 is?" Same student: "It's 24!" Teacher: What is 2k + k? Student: 3000! Q: What is the most erotic number? A: 2110593! Q: Why? A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay at10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3... Theorem. A cat has nine tails. Proof. No cat has eight tails. Since one cat has one more tail than no cat, it must have nine tails. One day, Jesus said to his disciples: "The Kingdom of Heaven is like 3x squared plus 8x minus 9." A man who had just joined the disciples looked very confused and asked Peter: "What, on Earth, does he mean by that?" Peter replied: "Don't worry  it's just another one of his parabolas." Speaking about parabolas, here is one more classic: "Explain the shape of the graph" Answer: "It's curvy, with a lighter bit at the end and a rather aesthetically pleasing slope downward towards a pretty flat strait bit..." Source: Immense World Quote of the Day: "There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened."  Douglas Adams READ THE NEXT INSTALLMENT OF "THE MATHEMATICAL HUMOR" SAGA  Click Here 
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33 Comments:
The love the expanding example...and the note by the teacher: "very funny Peter" made me lol
Dugg for the expanding example as well haha
i dugg this math entry. I'd have loved to solve stuff that way.
Wonderful. Thanks.
Did anyone else catch the error in the limit problem. That first one should be negative infinity.
Shouldn't it be zero not infinity or negative infinity?
lol... i like the solve for x "here it is" one... my friend attempted that once... that same friend answered a question with x... where x = the correct answer and got it right simply because our teacher didn't want to deal with it.
Actually it depends on the direction you approach. If you let x go to 8 from the right side of the number line, it is indeed infinity. From the left it is negative infinity.
The limit is approaching two different directions(negative infinity and infinity) from different sides. Thus, the limit does not exist.
Haven't any of you taken Calclus before?
" The limit is approaching two different directions(negative infinity and infinity) from different sides. Thus, the limit does not exist.
Haven't any of you taken Calclus before?"
Yay! Someone else who isn't a complete idiot on a page about math idiots!
The rest of you should start sending in your homework so we can double the size of this list.
Anonymous said...
The limit is approaching two different directions(negative infinity and infinity) from different sides. Thus, the limit does not exist.
This guy wins.
Calculus, for great justice
A general limit doesn't exist, but there is a left handed and right handed limit.
Sorry to break it to you guys...but CALC II talks about divergence of functions. I would recommend reading.
On a side note...Those types of limits are extremely useful in physics. So learn and love them :)
@andy:
Also, in physics, we don't worry about minus signs. If something is a positive quantity when it should have been a negative one (which you know from "physical reasoning" ... this is a proof for physicists) you just change the sign. You may also optionally comment "must have lost a minus sign somewhere".
Haven't any of you taken Calclus before?
Yes  as well as English and typing ;)
(That 'u' must be around here somewhere)
Scott said...
Did anyone else catch the error in the limit problem. That first one should be negative infinity.
2:39 PM
Duncan Grazier said...
Shouldn't it be zero not infinity or negative infinity?
2:42 PM
Anonymous said...
lol... i like the solve for x "here it is" one... my friend attempted that once... that same friend answered a question with x... where x = the correct answer and got it right simply because our teacher didn't want to deal with it.
2:44 PM
Joseph Hardin said...
Actually it depends on the direction you approach. If you let x go to 8 from the right side of the number line, it is indeed infinity. From the left it is negative infinity.
These can go in as real life jokes.
rotfl no offense
I loved them all :P.
But there's a little mistake in the joke about Jesus... to have a parabola, you need one of the variables to be squared, but the other one must remain lineal... meaning each one represents an axis (x or y).
So it should be like "3x squared plus 8y minus 9" if the parabola was parallel to Y, or "3y squared plus 8x minus 9"...or whatever, if it was parallel to X.
Sorry for my English.
Proof that Women are Evil
Women consume Time and Money>
Women = Time*Money
Time is Money> Time = Money
Substitution > Women = Money^2
Money is the root of all Evil >
Money = Sqrt(Evil)
Square both Sides > Money^2 = Evil
Substitute > Women = Evil
Enjoy
Hehehe, that one was cool :P
Its great to see mathematics gaining importance on digg. After Beauty Of Mathematics : via www.nonstopmasti.be this one is yet another example how fond people at digg are of mathamatics.
Proof: As Of Now this post has been dugg 988 times and the post Beauty of mathemagic dugg 1800 times in 5 days. Funny Isnt it???
A mathematical limerick:
A dozen, a gross and a score
Plus three times the square root of four
Divided by seven
Plus five times eleven
Is nine squared, and not a bit more
I once graded a paper where the student knew the end result but couldn't quite get there because of a zero in the numerator and a zero in the denominator. In a fit of pseudogenius, the student claimed zero divided by zero was one and his proof worked.
They forgot the annihilator function. Which is something that we made up when we got bored in precal with functions.
The Annihilator Function = The Square root of X divided by the Square Root of X.
Pffft, we made up math related Chuck Norris facts when I was in precalc.
Chuck Norris can make parallel lines intersect.
just from my school notebook! 8)
Realy fun!
i heard of one where it was a SAT's question saying "name the shapes" underneath the triangle they put 'sheila' and under the square 'tom' etc etc
Duh!! Guys. Sorry but What's so funny about it...
Expand...ROFL
thank you
that's very refreshing
you make me smile this day..
I think that is answer for desperates student who can find the right answer.. :p
Regarding the limit problem, there is no such thing as negative or positive infinity. Infinity is infinity! That's all!
One more thing: as X approaches 8, the equation approaches to one divided by zero, which in Math means infinity (try yourself...).
"Regarding the limit problem, there is no such thing as negative or positive infinity. Infinity is infinity! That's all!"
That's not true. In simple terms, a limit of infinity means the function increases without bound, while a limit of negative infinity means the function decreases without bound.
The formal definition of
lim(x>a) f(x) = infinity
would be
For all e in R, e > 0, there exists d in R, d > 0 such that if x  a < d, then f(x) < e
@murripita
actually there cant be 2 different variables in the parabola... its right how it is.. because if you have a graphing calculator, you have to have Y= and then the equation. it makes a parabola how it is written.. oyu should check your facts before posting a comment for all the world to see.
"actually there cant be 2 different variables in the parabola... its right how it is.. because if you have a graphing calculator, you have to have Y= and then the equation."
While it is right how it is, there can, in fact be two variables in a parabola. The general form of a parabola is:
(yk)=a(xh)^2
The equation doesn't necessarily need to be strictly y= . Defining values for k and h shifts the parabola so that its vertex is not at 0,0. But you are right  if you wanted to graph it on a calculator, you would need to rearrange some things and isolate the y.
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